Sex

Wax Play 101

By Julia McKinlay

As fall quickly approaches, so does talk of Pumpkin Spiced lattes and cozy sweaters. However, there is another way to keep warm this autumn and we assure you it’s sexier than butternut squash soup. That’s right, we are talking about bringing wax into the bedroom, and not in the form of your favourite Bath & Bodyworks candle…

Wax play is a fun, sensual, spicey way to both literally and figuratively heat up your sex life. According to an article published last year by Cosmopolitan, experimenting with wax is becoming increasingly popular. Data showed that “At least one partner in nearly 34 percent of couples has an interest in wax play." Never heard of Wax Play before? Have no fear. This article will be your guide to the ins and outs and safety precautions of wax experimentation. By the time you are done reading, you will be sure to look at candles a little differently…

So what exactly is it?

While we love using candles to set the vibe, this is a definite level up! Wax play is the act of dripping candle wax onto yourself or your partner’s skin for purposes of sexual or sensual gratification. It is connected to the BDSM community as it can be used as a fun way to inflict pleasurable pain, but it also can be used to ignite the senses without any pain at all.

Why do people like it?

As with most kinks, folks enjoy wax play for many different reasons, it all depends on the person. It can be the heat of the wax hitting skin, the silky feeling of the wax before it hardens, and/or the scraping the wax off (which really is oh so satisfying). Then there is the pleasure of watching wax being poured on someone… it’s sensual and sexy.

Sex experts say that the thrill of engaging in something a little dangerous and the anticipation of waiting for the wax to hit your skin can give you a rush of sexual excitement. It also stimulates multiple senses, enhancing pleasure and helping you to be present in the moment. The physical reaction to heat increases your overall sensitivity, making all of the other touches from your partner feel more intense.

Wax play can a very easy intro into the world of kink, but it can be done at varying degrees for those looking for something a bit more intense. In BDSM culture, masochists may like being splashed with hot wax as an enjoyably painful fantasy. For sadists, wax play is a versatile and interesting way of inflicting pain on their willing partner(s).

What to know before you begin?

Whether you are a kink master or someone wanting to try something new with your significant other, wax can be a sexy tool to know how to use… but you do have to know HOW to use it.

The first and most widespread misconception to note before starting your journey with wax play is that all candles are suitable for experimenting with. They are NOT! This means the pumpkin scented candle sitting on your bedside table is not safe to use to drip on yourself or someone else. Normal candle wax can get super hot very easily and not in a sexy way - by which we mean a not safe way, you risk extreme bodily harm and lasting burns.

Thankfully, the sex toy industry has all sorts of candles made specifically for wax play. These candles vary in wax heat levels and the type of wax itself. You can even get candles that are made with edible oil so that after being dropped the oil can be massaged in and maybe licked off.

Safety.

Along with using the right candle, comes setting up the right space to engage with those candles. It may seem obvious but candles of any kind pose a fire hazard. Make sure there are no flammable substances, such as open alcohol, oils, cleaning products, or dangling wall decorations or billowing curtains around you. Also, never leave the burning candles left unattended. Dealing with a fire would definitely be a vibe downer at the very least.

Wax play technique.

Now that you know why you may like wax play, and how to engage with it properly and safely we can explain the best part… how to actually play.

To begin, test the heat level. It is always best to test the wax on a small area of skin first such as the elbow before fully engaging. If the wax is a little too hot don’t run for water or ice just smear the wax with your hand. Doing this will instantly dilute the heat and it will cool everything off.

The farther away you are from the skin the cooler the wax will be, if you or your partner wants it hotter just simply bring the candle closer to the skin you are dripping on. You can additionally try dripping the wax in larger clusters on the skin which will also bump up the heat or spread apart droplets for cooler temperatures.

Once some wax has accumulated at the top of the candle, pouring the wax is easiest at a 45-degree angle. This will allow the wax to slowly drip down intermittently. You can tap the candle with your finger to control the dripping wax even more.

Ultimately it’s up to you where you want to drip the wax. You can experiment with sensitive areas such as nipples, belly buttons or even genitalia. However, make sure to avoid having any wax enter the vagina or anus internally as it can be hard to remove and negatively impact the bodily ecosystem.

You can even layer wax on top of other wax, or blindfold your partner so they are pleasantly surprised when they feel the wax drip on them.

The wax world is unlimited so explore and enjoy!

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