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Sex

8 tips on how to use a butt plug (and freaking love it)

By Maya Khamala

Butt plugs. There is very little poetry about them. Yet these sturdy little (or big) toys have multiple practical and pleasurable uses. 

Butt why?  

Without skirting any directness linguistically: you can put them to work loosening/stretching/relaxing/readying your asshole for anal sex, AKA anal training.

Or someone else can ready you. Or you can ready someone else. Like my use of the word ready?

It’s a key concept for anyone into trying (or continuing to try) any kind of anal penetration. We must all face the fact that anuses are not like vaginas. As in, they don’t self-lubricate and relax and expand in the same way as our vaginas do. They need extra help. After-school tutoring, if you will.

Click here to shop all anal toys.

If you’ve ever tried anal anything and felt it was horrifyingly bad, you probably weren’t ready. But with the right kind of loving, and maybe even a pre-coital afternoon of wearing your jazziest butt plug out and about as you scour the granola aisle, anal adventurers of all stripes are in for a damn good time.

Butt plugs are often used as a form of kink with domination and submission play. Wearing one can be a thrilling way of exploring vulnerability (or humiliation) in a way that brings deep, engorging pleasure. While some like to pull it in and out (as you would with a sex toy made for your vagina), they’re made to create a sensation of fullness in your ass.

Other options: leave it in for double penetration during masturbation, vaginal intercourse, mutual masturbation, or oral sex. Or, use it as a stand-alone accessory while you’re going about your day. To each their own.

So many orgasms, so little time 

The first time I slipped my very small, shiny, metal, sphincter-friendly item in through my back door, its weight was what struck me.

It was heavy. In a reeeeeaaally good way. I felt aroused as I walked around with it in. And when I masturbated clitorally with it inside, or had sex with it inside, it was pure ecstasy. I came faster and harder than I ever had. It was touching a whole new part of me while simultaneously exerting pressure in just the right spot.

Turns out there are tons of ultra-sensitive nerve endings in your rectum, and, depending on how the plug is used, the female Skene glands (AKA the female prostate) may be stimulated, which can be a very pleasant discovery, leading to whole new qualities of orgasms

Butt plugs for one and all: to each their own 

Butt plugs come in all shapes, sizes and materials, some of them with glittering rhinestone circumferences made to look like your asshole is, in fact, a glittery portal to another universe (in a good way), and some with fox, kitty, or rabbit tails hanging off them. For the animal lovers.

They’re designed to go in and stay for a while.

They’re tapered: small at the top, large in the middle, and slim again at the neck of the toy right before the flared base. THIS. IS. WILDLY. IMPORTANT. Flared base, people.

They’re made to make their presence felt, while remaining snugly in place.

You just gotta know how to use ‘em right 

Before I used my butt plug right, I also used the thing, well, uh, wrong. Once or twice. Ouch. Lesson learned: don’t rush.

Here are 8 helpful tips for embarking on your first butt plug jamboree.

1. Go to the bathroom 

Go to the bathroom first if you have to go. Practice good hygiene in preparation for whatever you have planned.

2. Start small 

It’s always best to start small and slowly work your way up. Some plugs even come in sets of multiple sizes, for this purpose. So practical.

3. Softness = goodness 

Softer materials like silicone and vinyl make for great toys as they are soft yet firm enough to allow easy insertion, and non-toxic. I like my stainless steel one a lot too. 

4. Lube. Lube. Lube. 

Have lube handy and nearby before commencing any anal insertion of any kind. Here are some top lube options.

5. Get turned on!  

Make sure you're super aroused before inserting a butt plug. I like to have an orgasm first. Loosens ya right up.

6. Take your sweet time 

On the best of days, I stand staunchly against the concept of “the quickie.” But when it comes to anal, this goes double. The purpose here is enjoyment, not efficiency. So relax.

Whether with a partner or by yourself, inserting a plug too fast can hurt. A lot. Start with your lubed fingers first to get used to the sensation and avoid any injury to your fragile anal canal. Only when you feel ready, insert the toy very slowly.

7. Wash your hands 

Always wash your hands after inserting your plug before you go anywhere else with those dainty fingers of yours, and avoid cross-contamination, or the spreading of bacteria from the anus to the vagina, which can cause infection. Make sure your partner always respects this rule too.

8. Wash your butt plug 

Wash your butt plug with hot water and soap immediately after use and let it air-dry. Never share anal toys given the risk of transmitting infections, viruses, or bacteria.

Once you get the hang of it, feel free to experiment and get creative! You might try quickly pulling the plug out as you cum for added sensation. Or you may try a vibrating butt plug. Find what feels right for you!

As always, have fun, lovelies, and never be afraid to let your freak flag fly. 

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